A Glow in the Dark

It’s a quiet evening in Varanasi. The city’s chaos has given way to calm. The clatter of dishes has stopped, and the rhythm of daily life is beginning to slow. But in one corner of your home, a screen glows silently. Your teenager sits hunched over their phone, eyes flitting across messages, reels, and stories. Occasionally, you catch a flicker of emotion—maybe a smile, or something more distant, more troubling. You wonder: who’s on the other side of that screen? Friends, or faceless threats?

For most of today’s teenagers, the digital world is their second home. But unlike the playgrounds of your youth, this world isn’t always safe. In fact, it can be brutal—especially when cyberbullying strikes. The taunts of our time ended with the school bell. Not anymore. Today’s cruelty is constant. It comes through memes, comments, fake profiles, and anonymous DMs—and its impact can be deeply damaging.

To keep up with this reality, parenting must evolve. The old model of control and discipline is not enough. What our teens need is not a rule-maker—but a partner. A listener. A Digital Ally.

Understanding Cyberbullying: A Beast of a Different Nature

Cyberbullying isn’t just a buzzword. It’s a lived experience for millions of Indian teens. It follows no schedule. There’s no pause button, no physical boundary that limits its reach. A child can be targeted while sitting with their family, during study time, or even in the middle of the night. What begins as a comment or post can spiral into a torrent of ridicule, shame, and fear—shared across WhatsApp groups, Instagram stories, or school meme pages.

Unlike traditional bullying, the digital version is amplified by its invisibility. Adults often don’t see it happening. Teenagers may not talk about it—especially in India, where many fear embarrassment or being misunderstood. Our culture’s obsession with reputation, academic excellence, and emotional restraint often makes young people feel that seeking help is a weakness, or worse, a source of shame for the family.

But the consequences are real. A single viral post can strip a child of their self-worth. Humiliation multiplies when it’s public. Anxiety sets in when there’s no escape. For some, the scars left behind are more than emotional—they manifest in poor academic performance, sudden mood swings, physical symptoms, and even depression.

Two Stories, Two Outcomes: How Your Response Shapes Everything

Let’s imagine two teens, both facing cyberbullying, but living in very different homes.

Anjali is 15 and recently tripped during her school’s annual sports day. A cruel classmate turns the photo into a meme, shared widely on Instagram. The comments mock her appearance, her fall, even her weight. For two days, she suffers in silence, trying to brush it off. But the pain deepens, and eventually, she gathers the courage to tell her father.

He reacts with outrage—not toward the bullies, but toward her. He takes her phone, declares social media a “waste of time,” and tells her she should’ve known better. His voice is loud, his tone final. She walks back to her room, not just phone-less, but hope-less. The very person she turned to for help has now become another closed door.

Now meet Rohan. He discovers someone has made a fake Instagram account using his photo and name. The account is sending hateful messages to his classmates. He’s terrified—afraid that his friends will believe those words came from him. But he remembers a conversation he had with his mother weeks ago. She had told him, without preaching, that if anything ever felt off online, he could talk to her—no judgment, just support.

He walks into her room. She listens. Completely. No interruptions, no panic. She asks questions gently, sits beside him, and together they go through the steps: taking screenshots, reporting the profile, drafting a message to explain the situation to his peers. They even laugh a little when they finally press “submit.” In that moment, Rohan doesn’t just get his problem solved—he gains confidence, relief, and most importantly, trust in his parent.

Becoming a Digital Ally: What It Really Means

Being a digital ally doesn’t mean being perfect. It means showing up. It means asking, not accusing. Understanding, not dismissing. Being curious about the digital spaces your child inhabits instead of fearing or fighting them.

Instead of lecturing about screen time, ask them about what they love online. Show interest in their favorite creators, the games they play, the content they find funny. You don’t have to love the same things—but your willingness to learn makes you approachable.

Set boundaries together. Instead of enforcing rigid rules, involve your teen in creating a family digital agreement. You can all agree to things like no phones during meals, keeping devices outside bedrooms at night, and always asking before posting photos of each other. When rules are built collaboratively, they feel less like restrictions and more like respect.

Perhaps most importantly, practice the pause. When your teen comes to you with a problem—especially one involving the internet—pause your instinct to react. Instead, listen. Listen fully. Because your calmness will be remembered long after your advice.

Also, take a hard look at your own digital behavior. Are you glued to your screen while asking them to get off theirs? Do you forward gossip or unverified content in family groups? Are you modeling the digital habits you want them to develop?

Parenting is never just about what we say. It’s about what we show.

When the Worst Happens: How to Respond if Your Child is Being Bullied Online

If your teen becomes the target of online abuse, your first job is to be their anchor. Let them know they’re not alone. Don’t question why they didn’t come to you sooner. Don’t dismiss it as “just online stuff.” Validate their feelings. Tell them you believe them.

Then, take action—but do it with them, not for them. Help them document everything: screenshots, usernames, timestamps. Walk them through the process of blocking and reporting. If the abuse is coming from a classmate, set up a meeting with school authorities and present your evidence calmly and clearly.

In more serious cases, especially where threats or blackmail are involved, report it to the appropriate legal channels. There are national helplines and official cybercrime portals for this. Encourage a break from the platform involved, but also make space for healing. Watch for signs of emotional distress. If anxiety, sadness, or withdrawal continue for more than a couple of weeks, please—seek help from a counselor. It’s not weakness. It’s strength.

A Final Reflection: The Real Firewall is Your Relationship

You can’t control every comment your child sees. You can’t stop every cruel post or fake profile. But what you can offer is stronger than any content filter or parental control app—you can offer trust.

When your child knows they can come to you, no matter what, the bullies lose power. When your teen feels seen, heard, and understood, the internet becomes less of a threat—and more of a tool they can navigate with confidence.

The best part? You don’t need to understand every app or meme trend. You only need to understand your child.

Because in the world they’re growing up in, your relationship is their greatest protection.